Editor’s note: Yes, this isn’t really news but it’s the rare time when Alaska politics crosses over with my other chief interest: Bad, fun TV. So, BEAR with me.
Fox’s “The Masked Singer” is peak bad television.
And I should know after the mystery of what B- to D-list celebrity might be belting it out behind some actually, truly neat costumes got me to watch the first two seasons (mostly on fast-forward). And, hey, even a handful of the celebs know how to sing.
Wednesday’s episode, though, sent the show to new heights by capping off a day where coronavirus put a halt to the NBA season and a halt to all travel from Europe with a performance by none other than former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, who performed in a cotton candy-colored bear suit complete with a bedazzled pink heart.
“After years of hearing all the phony baloney, I’m sick of everyone not knowing who I really am. So this momma bear is coming out of hibernation,” Palin said during the show’s customary clue package. “Maybe I’ve been a little polarizing, but just like a bear it’s all been to protect my cubs.”
The clues, which included ice skates, a minivan and the framed trophy heads of other eliminated performers, and performance had the judges guessing Tonya Harding, Candice Cameron-Bure and, yep, Palin-impersonator Tina Fey.
But Palin’s appearance on the show was a one-and-done sort of thing as her rendition of “Baby Got Back,” which was adapted to be about male posteriors but didn’t include the word “horny,” was not enough to keep her alive after the debut of the season’s third group of singers, which included the Swan, the Rhino, the T-Rex, the Astronaut and whatever a Night Angel is. Previously unmasked singers from this season include Lil Wayne, Drew Carey, Chaka Khan, Tony Hawk, Dionne Warwick and Tom Bergeron.
As is tradition with the show, Palin struggled with the mask while the camera quickly cut between the audience, judges—with Ken Jeong literally bouncing in anticipation—and back to Palin as everyone feverishly chanted “Take it off! Take it off!” (I told you it’s peak bad TV).
“Oh my god, wow! You guys cannot believe,” exclaims host Nick Cannon as he sets eyes on Palin, who had her back to the cameras while getting her trademark glasses on.
“Is that Tina Fey?” asked judge Nicole Scherzinger, who had earlier shot down Jeong’s guess of Brittany Spears, before Palin finally turns around and shrugs to the audience.
Unmasked, Palin says she picked the bear because of the “whole momma bear thing.”
“You kicked butt, Sarah Palin,” said judge and noted anti-vaxxer Jenny McCarthy.
“Well thanks, I was really appreciative of ‘The Masked Singer.’ They let me, um, exploit men. Did you guys notice that I changed the lyrics and it was all about men’s butts and not women,” Palin replied. “This is the weirdest thing I’ve ever done, that’s for sure, but it’s all about fun, it’s unity. This is all good, this is something our country needs right now, too.”
“Celebrate big butts, everybody needs that,” Cannon adds.
Here’s her encore performance: